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April 13th, 2011
04:34 AM ET
Shocking Pink?: Mom paints boy's toenails in J.Crew ad
Would you paint your young son’s nails?
A J.Crew advertisement gaining lots of blog buzz this week shows a mom painting her son’s toenails pink with the caption “Lucky for me, I ended up with a boy whose favorite color is pink.”
Bloggers are asking if it crosses the gender line, and many parents are responding and saying, what’s the big deal?
What do you think? Let us know here. Kiran and Christine will read your responses on air.
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What is the big deal.
My 2 year old likes his toes painted when I (his mother) paint mine. He picks out the color just like I do. His favorites are red, purple, and banana yellow. Does that make him gay? No! Kids like bright colors. Because of this ignorance me and my son are now painting our toes pink.
Rather than worrying about the gender implications of painting a boy's toenails pink, we should be concerned about the toxic chemicals DBP, toluene and formaldehyde that many nail polishes contain, and the effect that they may have on our children.
chuck liddell paints his toe-nails. so, BAM!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! lol. but the little boy's favorite color is pink, so i don't see the harm in her painting his nails. if he grows up gay, so what? she didn't make him that way.
As a father I was annoyed when my wife wanted to paint my young sons toes. The same way I would not want my young SON wearing a dress, or womens panties I would not want him carrying a purse or painting his nails. This is associated with being female period. I do not think it is healthy at this age to do that and confuse issues. No one cares about the color, nor do people care about what people do in their own homes in private. However this does appear to me to be intened to push a blatant agenda, as well as to use this agenda in a shocking way designed to get free press. It obviously worked in both cases. Btw I sadly VOTED for Obama, gladly support the right of a woman to choose, and am for civil unions for all, and gays in the military (for various reasons).. so do not put me in a conservative box for disagreeing with those loudest here.
I wouldn't do it, and think it is a bit weird for a mother to do that, but I certainly do not think it is abusive or will change his sexual preference later in life.
I am by far not a conservative, and I also tend to vote Democrat, but I'm sorry, this is where I have to disagree with my liberal friends. I think letting your boy dress up in dresses, wear nail polish and explore is not a healthy way to raise a boy. Let's face the facts, boys throughout history have been expected to fight wars, and defend the women folk when the chips are down. Sure, it is easy to raise "girly men" as we have allowed technology to do the defending and hard work, but if an EMP takes out our technology, history shows us that when invasions happen, the society without strong men wind up having the women raped and the men killed. Men need to be strong and masculine and not allowed to become prissy.
I think the add is adorable, at least the son and mother are having a great time and she is actually spending time WITH her son. Anyway, it is society that places pink as being a "girl color" and most children are not aware of what society calls normal. I think it is pretty disgusting that this even makes the news. When I was younger, my father used to let me paint his toes and would even go to work with it on. Does that make him gay? I am pretty sure it doesn't. People just like to complain about things and are so afraid of drifting away from the "Standards of society"
J. Crew is getting exactly what they hoped for with that ad. Free advertising from CNN.
Don't forget that back in the days pink was the color for boys as time pass it changed
Oh noes! A boy painting his toenails pink is an affront to Jeebus! He will catch the gay and spread it to more people!
Conservatives should be put down for crimes against the progress of our species.
Reminds me of when I first got married. My husband was first to go to work with pink shirts and underwear. Back when not real accepted. When he boss commented, he told him his underwear also matched..
My son little I painted one nail yeah it was pink, He is new dad now. I suppose my grandson is gonna have a pink nail too.
Who really cares? Would it be the same debate if we saw a girl wearing a baseball cap or a pair of jeans? Girls are suppose to wear dresses everyday, right? The picture just merely displays a mother and her child(sex isn't really the issue) enjoying a "Saturday morning" lazing around the house. Notice the container of markers on the counter.
Surely, we all have more important things to gripe about....taxes, lack of jobs and gas prices to name a few.
I speak as a non-parent and as a bisexual man who has worn pink nail polish on many occasions and has a firm grasp and belief in the need to expand our gender roles. But I also call a spade a spade. The ad was activism, prepackaged self-important snark.
Most of you are missing the point. Is this some sort of gender/transgender battlefield issue being drummed up? Yes. But not by the people making the reaction. The ad was published with a clear purpose- to incite this very debate using a child model who has no awareness of it. No one planned this ad thinking "this won't ruffle any feathers." It's whole PUPOSE was to ruffle feathers It's putting itself in peoples faces and going "hey, are you offended? Are you intolerant? Are you a bigot! Because if you don't like the ad, you must be." I used to play this game with my brother. It's called I'm Not Touching You. Put a hand in his face for a half hour and then he gets all mad and I tell mom, what?! I never touched him. I stopped doing that because I turned nine!
Are there people who have some inclination that the toe polish will "turn him gay" Who knows! Because the only people I can find even using that phrase are those of you who think the ad is "beautiful." i don't see anyone else here saying it. Just you.
So! A group of conservatives (overzealous social conservative hypocrites with a homophobic complex) dress-up with pink panties under their pants and had a Tea Party!
OMG lighten up Conservatives! I’m a blonde 6’4” 220 lb Aryan man god with a light beard and I play Pretty Princess with my 5 year old daughter. She dresses me up with toy jewelry and we both have a lot of fun and quality time together. She gets a kick-out-of-it and I enjoy making my daughter smile! I also use to play with baby dolls that would be considered only for girls when I was a young child and I never turned into a homosexual. You conservatives are such hypocrites you talk about the government staying out of people’s lives but you pry into other people’s lives and make demands on how other people should run their households and live their lives!
So if I paint my daughter's toenails, does that make me gay? If my daughters paint my toenails while painting theirs for fun, does that challenge my sexuality? If I wear the pink shirt that my daughter's pick out for my birthday present, am I at risk of cross-dressing? If I by my daughter a blue shirt, or she shows a propensity towards cars as toys, so I worry about her being lesbian? In our society, why would a mother want to "push" her son to be gay? What I see is a loving mother with a busy career that is finding away to have a deep and meaningful interaction with her son. If only more "busy" dads would do the same. The only real risk here is that the child may grow up knowing his mom loves him completely, unconditionally and without judgement. Imagine if he took that message out into the world. What a wonderful place it would be.
Maybe it's because I'm a man, a manly man. Maybe it's because of my age 65, an old one, Maybe it's because I'm a Republican, a conservative one. Maybe beause I'm a Christian, a fundalmentalist one but I've always preferred black toe nail polish but the kid looks great. witth pink. Check out the shared smiles.
I too have a son who's favorite color is pink AND we have painted toenails before. What would the fear be? Are people afraid that these boys will be less masculine because of this? What people seem to be saying is that a boy who likes pink must be gay. The only way that I see this is a problem is if society thinks that being gay is bad. Haven't we moved beyond this? If every boy who liked pink became gay, we would have a lot more gay people and if every boy who turned out to be gay was told that it was wrong, we would have a lot more teenagers committing suicide. Oh wait, we do.
You cannot make people gay or affect gender identity based on nurture. Otherwise, our children would be polite and respectful.
the pink is for girls/blue is for boys concept is just an American notion. it doesn't exist anywhere else. Women and men, boys and girls wear what color they like. I have boy/girl twins and when I paint my daughter's toenails, my son always wants his done, too. Who cares? My son is smiling and happy.
I am appalled, but not surprised, by the level of ignorance of those thinking that pink toenails on a boy can cause gender identity issues. Gender is predetermined and genetic.
If people spent more time supporting diversity, our gay and lesbian children would not face as much adversity and exploitation in the teen and adult years.
I am both a preschool teacher and mom. My son was gay. May I suggest reading: My Princess Boy by: Cheryl Kilodavis for some empathy.
I was unaware that the color pink being painted on your toenails means that you absolutley have to be sexually attracted to males.
Ladies’ Home Journal article in June 1918 said, “The generally accepted rule is pink for the boys, and blue for the girls. The reason is that pink, being a more decided and stronger color, is more suitable for the boy, while blue, which is more delicate and dainty, is prettier for the girl.”
Read more: http://www.smithsonianmag.com/arts-culture/When-Did-Girls-Start-Wearing-Pink.html#ixzz1JQh7AGxT
I think the mother deep down was hoping she had a girl. I guess this is how she shows it?
I simply think whatever sex your child are, Please teach them that it is not cool to put on lipstick, fingernail polish, make-up, anything adult's do until they're of age to make decisions for themselves!....Point blank.
The only thing shocking about allowing a boy (or a girl) express themselves by wearing pink or anything else they like is our countries reaction to children simply expressing themselves. Many people would rather suppress our childrens true creative natures so that they don't have to worry that wearing pink will make our boys gay. This is ridiculous. My seven year old son is a snow ski racer and proudly wears a hot pink race helmet because HE LIKES IT. He says it makes him go fast and whenever someone makes a rude comment about it, he simply replies "Catch Pink" and flies down the mountain leaving them in his powder. I'm proud that my child is secure enough within himself that he chooses to wear and do things HE likes rather than be a follower.
It is time for a male revolution, a man’s liberation movement. All women should be concerned each time a boy or man engages in "female behavior" and are criticized as wrong doing, as if "acting" female makes them inferior. Women gained many liberties last century, now should be our century. A woman is not (now) criticized for dressing in "men’s" clothes. Both women and men are aiding to this discrimination. If a pink color appeals to someone, they should have the right to decide it. Women want the monopoly on "femaleness" and men are allowing limitations to choose a color or clothing item. When are men going to realize that women are choosing how they dress and how we dress? Men are convinced they will be inferior if they choose to behave "female". It's about a person's right to choose what appeals to them. I should aspire to be "female" since they fought and gained many rights and heavily influence men’s choices. The opposite is not true. Men: labeling a male in pink as inferior (or worse Gay) is only aiding women to control us. All forms of discrimination are wrong. When are we going to remove all gender bias and restrictions? Maybe pink does not appeal to you, but you should not be critical of others who do. Women and men should only be differentiated by biology, if you choose to categorize. What we put on our bodies and choose to "decorate" them in colors, fabrics, or styles should be a personal choice and not restricted by those who cry the loudest. This ad just shows a special moment between mom and son, as she might have enjoyed with a daughter. Having toe polish does not make him transgendered or will make him a sissy, or serial killer. Those who can make such a comment are only insecure individuals with lack of intelligence. It is sad someone can think like that. It is 2011, is wearing oink by males an end to society or the beginning of our liberation and freedom?
I have 3 boys. My middle son, who is 3 1/2, LOVES to have his nails/toes painted. I see no issue with this, whatsoever. When he was 2, we were at the store, and he saw a baby doll, dressed in pink, that he wanted to buy. Again, I had no issue with this and my husband and I bought him the doll. I would NEVER discourage any of my children from being who they are/expressing their ideas. I love my children, I support my children and I encourage them to be individuals, with their own thoughts, feelings, wishes and desires.
really people! my 3 year old son's toes are matching mine- a nice bright green- why do people care it is a nice mom son bonding moment- it doesnt mean he doesnt go out in the back yard with his painted toes and kill worms with a stick or pretends he has a gun made of legos- he does all that and paints his toes with me. Boys will be boys. Isn't pink and blue something we hold on to because back once upon a time they needed to keep track of newborns differently? Does it matter?
I say Bravo! The ad brings back memories of my son's very early years when he and many of his friends delighted in dress-up and exploring all sides of their interests and tastes. Sequined tutus and nailpolish were donned along with capes, swords, and fire helmets – sometimes all at the same time. To allow for this full range of exploration and play at an early age encourages a fullness of confident tastes, engagement and self-expression later. Certainly my now 18 year old son shows this to be true.
There's crap happening in all parts of the world but we're focused on a boy wearing pink nail polish and if it questions his sexuality.
That's two points for the US.
Child protective services! She may not "make" him gay but I say even odds that kids winds up maladjusted. My money is on serial killer
It's ridiculous that this is even an issue. Guess what? Little boys like nail polish, just as little girls like nail polish, because it's colorful and fun! End of story. Why not let little boys do what makes them happy without having to put labels on their behavior? Believe me, society will force them to conform to standard "male" behavior soon enough. Until then, let them live in ignorant bliss!
Is this one of those situations where if anyone says that this is another example of the systematic emasculation of men in a feminist-indoctrinated society, the post will be removed, but anything saying it shows "open-mindedness" and tolerance will stand? Please do not be under the illusion that this is freedom of speech. It is political correctness gone array to support a social agenda that seeks to undermine God's order and bring our great nation to ruin. It's just that those perpetrating have the veil pulled over their eyes and have no idea they are doing it.
I have many gay friends and have no problem with adults expressing themselves. But this boy is far too young to be truly expressing his love for pink nail polish. I try to be fair, but my first reaction to this ad I saw yesterday while leafing through the J Crew catalog was that it was odd. I don't think I have the right to be mad or upset, he's not my son, but I do think it is odd. And I admit, I wouldn't feel odd if it was a mom and her daughter. And I wouldn't feel odd if it was a little girl in a football uniform. If I saw a grown man with pink toe nail polish, I'd assume he was gay. I know those aren't fair reactions, but it seems odd to me. Plus, I feel like this is a little staged to get our reactions and get attention for J. Crew.
My 4 year old went to school with his nails painted yesterday. The teachers aid went out and bought polish remover to take it off, because the girls were making fun of him. I received abunch of grief over that. I didn't think it was a big deal, they sure did. I'm not worried, someone will come out w/ male polish.
I grew up in the "perfect" environment as a child – for the most part. My childhood was mostly wonderful. My father was in the Air Force and was the perfect role model. My mother was very caring but strict. Still, I always felt I was a girl in a male body. My parents tried pain (beatings) and humiliation to get me to stop dressing as a girl all through my childhood. I learned to hide who I was. I played the "male role" expertly, starring on the high school football team, working at my family's sawmill, etc., but in the end I couldn't hide who I was any longer.
I transitioned to living as a woman when I was 48-years old and I have now had surgery and finally live a very happy life - no amount of beatings or mental abuse stopped me from becoming my true self in the end!
You ARE who you ARE! You CANNOT be "turned" Gay or Transgender by another person!!! When are these IGNORANT people finally going to realize this and stop abusing LGBT children to try to stop them from being who they really are??!!
On one hand, I'm finding it very tiring that we have to keep justifying something that we are born with, but on the other, press like this keeps the plight of America's LGBT community in the spotlight. However, this ad isn't a commentary on that. It's a picture of a little boy having an obviously wonderful time with his mom.
This could just as easily be a commentary on parenthood and the plight of all the children who feel abandoned by parents that obviously don't give a crap about them or have the time to spend with them.
I think this ad is totally adorable. I think J. Crew hit it out of the park on this one.
I think it's terrific. This particular gender rule is so ridiculously arbitrary, and it costs way more to a boy's self esteem to prevent them from this if they want to do it than allowing it does. My nephews both went through nail painting stages and favorite-color-pink phases, and they're still upstanding citizens of this country, thank you very much. Let 'em have fun instead of being boxed in by a rule that means absolutely nothing.
If we can survive "Ellen" coming out on TV, TV shows Modern Family gay couple, US of Tara has a gay son on it, Shameless tV show has gay underage son who has relations with an much older Middle eastern man or wait the scary "Will and Grace" show... We can survive this boys pink toenails.
EVERYONE PLEASE "JUST GET OVER IT!"
What is the big deal? Are you afraid that it will make them gay? That's really what it comes down to isn't it? Painting toenails will have no more influence on them then making a hockey lover (me) catch a baseball. You can make me catch a ball but I still won't like baseball. What small closed minds some people have.
horrible!!!!!
Seriously, with everything going on in the world, this is the top story! The little kid is five. If he wants to wear pink nail polish let him. Just because he likes the colour pink does not mean he is going to grow up confused about his sexuality. I look at the ad and see a mother and son having a good time. We are socialized from the day we are born into the gender we are supposed to perform and when an ad like this is published there is controversy because he is not acting like a boy.
Even people pay their dogs toe nails. This is just plan stupid to even be talking about.
It looks like they are a fun moment.. People get over it. Girls wear Blue.
The outrage over this ad is just one of the many examples of how people in our society become extremely uncomfortable when gender roles for BOYS/MEN are tested. I emphasize boys/men because when it comes to gender role expectations this group is held to a stricter set of standards than are girls/women. Think back to to the mother whose son dressed as Daphne from Scooby-Doo for Halloween and all the flack she received for that. We rarely see examples of little girls (and their parents) being attacked for expressing in stereotypical masculine ways. Society, in general, needs to get it together and realize that gender identity is something we are born with and that gender expression and gender roles are culturally conditioned from birth (e.g, dressing baby boys in blue and baby girls in pink, etc.). Kudos to J. Crew for helping to expand the spectrum of gender expression, especially for little boys who are all to often bullied and teased for expressing their natural feminine side!
It’s just an ad – no reason to get upset about it or take it seriously – if anything the ad accomplished its purpose to garner attention for J Crew (whoever that is) … but I kind of feel bad for the kid he will be ribbed about this for much of his life
My 6'-4" 20-year old son painted his toenails hot pink to rally his hockey team. It surprised the rest of the team as well as the medical staff in an emergency room visit. No one questioned his heterosexuality, but it certainly made them question their assumptions about pink nail polish! The polish stayed on for weeks as the team kept winning, right to the league championship.
I love this ad! It's adorable; just seeing it makes me happy.
I love this add!! It's adorable; just seeing it makes me happy.
And? It is the current (US) society that is saying what defines masculinity and femininity. Painting her son's toenails pink is no more going to 'influence' his sexuality than letting a girl play with GI Joe. In some countries, men wear, what we would define as, dresses. Makeup is the norm. And still in other countries where a family doesn't have a son or daughter, they will take an existing child and 'change' them to the other sex (ie force social mores of the opposite sex). Those who have their panties in a wad need to step back and see the forest for the trees. Stop fixating on sexuality and start fixating on the person as a whole.
For a country that (still) puts on a Puritanical face, we are OBSESSED with sex. Let it go!
Just more h-phobia! There is absolutely nothing wrong with this ad. As the parent of a gay daughter, I know that painting a boys toenails pink will not give him gender identity issues! Gender identity is determined in the womb, there is no doubt about that in my mind. It is time the ignorant get with it and stop making life difficult for those who had no choice in the matter.
Just more homophobia! There is absolutely nothing wrong with this ad. As the parent of a gay daughter, I know that painting a boys toenails pink will not give him gender identity issues! Gender identity is determined in the womb, there is no doubt about that in my mind. It is time the ignorant get with it and stop making life difficult for those who had no choice in the matter.
This shows how much times have changed. When I gre up in the '70s & '80s there is no way a parent would've applied pink polish on any of their sons.
Washing dishes and caring for the home is not a woman's job.
If you agree you offend someone and if you disagree you offend some one.
As for me, none of my grndsons will wear pink polish, be a cheerleader oor wear skirts.
Thank you
Do we not have more in life to worry about? Pretty sure I dressed my sons in dresses, painted their nails and curled their hair a time or two. They are very much male. The oldest and his wife are gracing us with a grandchild this summer. We have much more to worry about as a country. Why would this ad surprise anyone that knows of J Crew or any trendy store?!
This is the problem with America: why must we limit children by saying that ALL girls MUST use pink and play with dolls and ALL boys MUST use blue and play with trucks? Today's children are so closed-minded and limited, that we wonder where their sense of exploration has gone by the time they are teenagers. This is not a big deal. It's the closed-minded adults that make it a big deal. Get over it, America.
Thought Fox News was all about not infringing on peoples' freedoms. Why should Fox News have the right to tell J.Crew how to do their advertising?
What's the big deal?! If the kid supposedly like pink and wants nails painted pink then so what?! Individuality!! Hypothetically should the mom attempt to alter or persuade the child's fondness for pink or dolls or maybe dance music, well how about football or guns.. I mean come on where does it end?
i think is grate let the young ones exspress them selfs and let them know its ok to be diferent
let the BOY paint your nail not his, and let him pick a diffferent color, so as to start acting like a BOY,, or are you trying to make him like feminine things so he grows up that way ??
Please. What if this was a father painting his daughter's toe nails and expressing that HE was glad her favorite color is pink? Would that make him gay? This is a boy spending time with his mother. Nonsense like this is what keeps the stigma alive.
in some south pacific cultures a mother with no sons will choose a son to become a daughter (mahu) he is dressed like a girl raised as a girl and forced to cook and clean and relate as a girl, from a very young age. this has no effect on the sexual orientation of the child, and should prove that sexual preference is predetermined and not a learned behavior.
I find it hard to believe that critics are targeting JCrew for such an innocent add. I have serious doubts that this was anything other than a piece of marketing, and not a larger social commentary on gender constructs.
Perhaps, this conversation would be MORE interesting and relevant if it addressed the larger issue in society which defines "men" and "women" according to such a narrow binary.
Painting her son's toenails pink will not turn him gay or transgendered. If he turns out to be either one later on in life it was because he already was long before he had his toenails painted. I was born male and my parents made sure I knew I was male. They would always correct me if I did anything or showed any interest in anything that was "for girls." If I wore any article of women's clothing, it was always explained to me that it was "wrong" to do so. However, here I am at age 41, and I still feel like I should have been born a girl. Everything they did should have made me otherwise, right? I guess I just wasn't paying close enough attention! My point is that no matter what our parents do, we are going to be who we are.
Two war fronts, record unemployment, and a barely functioning government - and yet this somehow worthy of news coverage. CNN, shake your head!!!